Friday, November 20, 2009

I'm a bad fur mommy...

If any of you follow my tweets (@ihatepinkmom or look in the lower right corner of my blog) you will be aware that the other day I found a suspicious looking "chocolate sprinkle" aka mouse turd in my bathroom. Anyone who's had a mouse knows that you must nip the problem in the bud IMMEDIATELY or you will never get rid of the damn things. So I promptly put out some mouse bait that we had on hand, from last year's garage mouse. I put it behind the garbage can in my bathroom, and then made sure to keep the door closed during the day. I didn't want my kids or dogs getting into it. At night I left the door open, so the mouse could feast on his last supper while the dogs were crated and the kids in bed. All went according to plan, and I found small nibble marks last night on the poison. I was feeling very triumphant!
This morning I went to take my shower while the dogs were still crated, so the door was open. My son let the dogs out of the cage when he came down while I was in the shower. I get out of the shower, dry off, and head for the bedroom to get dressed when I see the puppy eating something green. At first I thought it was a crayon. There were only tiny crumbs left scattered on the carpet. Suddenly, I had a flash of recognition, and I ran to the bathroom. NO POISON! "SHIT, OH $#@%! OH NO, OH CRAP WHAT DO I DO?" I grabbed my phone and called the vet. She told me I need to make her throw up, and to make her drink hydrogen peroxide until she does. Luckily I just bought a new bottle last week. Seriously, I had only like a 1/4" in the bottom of the old bottle a few days ago. If I hadn't this whole thing could have been worse. So I use a syringe and force the peroxide down her throat, while she tries to bite my hand off to keep that nasty stuff out of her mouth. (Puppy teeth are so sharp and I don't know how she didn't cut the skin.) She throws up the poison after about 5 syringes of it, and then I had to wait 15 min and start over. This time no poison left. Then I realize that one of the other dogs could have licked up some of the poison that I didn't vacuum up yet (thank goodness the baby was still asleep!)
I force peroxide down the male Boston (Edward) and he throws up. Nothing. Phew! Now the female. Let me just tell you that she is THE hardest dog to give anything to orally. It takes 3 vet techs to hold her down and give her a worming pill at the doctor and she only weighs 13 pounds. This was a serious battle. After the second syringe of her fighting me and pushing it out of her mouth, I just started tearing up. Thinking to myself. "OH MY GOD SHE MIGHT DIE, BECAUSE I CAN'T GET HER TO TAKE THIS." I finally mustered the strength to get a 3rd syringe full down her throat. And then I waited to see if it would work. (The peroxide foams when it contacts the hydrochloric acid in your stomach, which then fills up your stomach so much it causes vomiting.)
Finally after 5 minutes, she threw up. The first batch showed nothing, and I thought I just went through all that for nothing. The second tiny fleck of poison. I don't know if that would have been enough to kill her, but it certainly wouldn't have been good. Since the poison causes internal hemorrhage it would have been difficult to tell anything was wrong until it did a lot of damage.
Now the funny part. The whole time I was doing that I was naked. Never got to the point of getting dressed. So by the time the whole thing was over I had to take another shower. I was covered in a rash (just had my allergy shots yesterday, and am allergic to dogs), and hydrogen peroxide. I took a pic of my arm to show you, but it was literally everywhere.

This is 3 bags of barf & the paper towels it took to clean it up. Yay.

Then I had to rush out of the house, to get to Lillie's 9 month check up. I'm still having an anxiety attack 4 hrs later.

The dogs are fine. They are playing outside like nothing ever happened. Don't call the Animal Police.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Get With It GM

About a week ago I decided it was time to purchase Lillie's new car seat to replace her infant carrier. I don't take her out in that thing much anymore, and when I do I nearly give myself a it was time. Now, being that I hate switching car seats back and forth I have a car seat for each car. So I needed to buy 2 car seats, and instead of buying 2 new ones for Lillie. I decided to buy the kids new car seats for my car, and put the old ones in my husband's pick-up. I set my sights on the Britax Marathon, because it has such good ratings for both safety and user friendly features. My sister assured me that they take only minutes to install. "How wonderful would that be?" I thought to myself.

So yesterday afternoon I set out to install those puppies in my car. All excited that this should only take a few minutes, and my children would be forever safe and secure. I put my daughters in, rear-facing on the passengers side, and moved around to the driver's side to put in my son's. Little did I know that the people that design car LATCH systems like to play "Russian Roulette" with the placement of the anchors. They put anchors in the passenger's side, and the center, but not in the driver's side. Why? Why not just put them in every seat to give people flexibility? My Toyota had them in every seat, AND it had removable headrests, another awesome feature for car seat installation.

I just sat there considering my options. I could either A) put my kids right next to each other, but I couldn't even consider that one without breaking out into maniacal laughter. I mean really? Put my kids in poking distance of each other? I'd never have a peaceful drive again! B) put my son in the 3rd row, but then I would have to climb back there to buckle him in, give him snacks on long drives, wipe his nose, etc. And finally, C) install the car seat with the lap/shoulder belt, which makes you feel like you love one kid less. Guess which one I picked?

You got it GM! I chose to love my 3 year old, first-born son, less than his baby sister. I hope you're happy with yourself. It's totally understandable. I mean those little metal loops probably cost an arm and a leg. Oh, and then you'd have to hire someone to install the extra set, so that's an annual salary of $80,000, which would raise the price of the Denali to $100,000. Ya, you're right, we don't need those loops. It's better if my son flies out of the car, because he only has a flimsy lap belt holding him in.

We cool GM! You gotz the justifikashun heer.

Monday, November 2, 2009

Send me your mess of the day

Amazingly my kids haven't been making that many devestating messes lately *knock on wood.* So I would love to see some of yours! Snap a pic of those messy messes and I will use them as part of my Mess of the Day feature. :)

Send them to my email.