Big Girls Don't Cry

I've always been a crier. I cry when I'm happy. I cry when I'm sad. I cry when I'm frustrated. I cry when I'm mad. It's just how I am, and it's kind of embarrassing. Once, when I had just moved from Washington to Iowa during my Sophomore year of high school, I had to write a paper about someone that I look up to. Well, I wrote it about my gymnastics coach. She was like a second mom to me when I was little. I spent so many hours in her care that I would call her mom by accident. I loved her. So I wrote this paper, in a class of people I didn't know, and was then asked to read it aloud. I cried. It probably doomed me from having friends at that school. Not only was I the "new kid" but I was the "new kid" who cries about stupid papers.
So you get the idea about how much I cry. Well, this story is about how proud I am that I did NOT cry.

Friday I went to Costco. Going to Costco is a big deal, because I only go once every 6-8 weeks and I have to drive an hour or more to get there. We don't have one any closer than that, and so I often have to pick up things for other people. This trip my sister asked me to get her a GPS and I was going to buy my husband an iPod. I did my detailed trip through the store. Sure not to miss any items. Just as I was finishing the last of my list the baby started fussing. Time to feed her again. Perfect timing, since we were nearly done.

Well, I got my groceries on the belt. All rung up, and I swiped my debit card. Declined. I swiped it again. Declined. I swiped it a third time; very quickly, in case the speed made a difference. DECLINED!! I was starting to freak out. I couldn't use credit, because you must have a PIN, and I don't know mine. I couldn't write a check, because I was using my moms floating card. So I look at the cashier and say "I don't know what to do; it's not taking it. I can't write a check, because it's a business card." Lillie is screaming at the top of her lungs. It is hotter than the devil's ass in the store. I am sweating. People behind me in line are tapping their feet. I feel like I want the Earth to swallow me whole.

"I just put my husband's paycheck in, so I don't understand" I say.

"Of course you do ma'am," she says (I know this must have been sarcastic). "Okay, we'll call the manager to void it. Can you get cash to pay for it?"

"Yes, I can get cash out" I say. "Where is the ATM?"

"All the way down at the end, by customer service. Push your cart over there while you get it."

So I pushed my cart over by the area where you pick up the expensive items after you pay. Then I hauled the kids out of the cart. My son is upset, of course, because he thinks we are leaving without his giant box of fruit snacks. So I have to convince him that we are coming back for them. We go down to the ATM, and I swipe my card. My son pushes the red button. I swipe my card again to start over. My son pushes the green button. I tell him not to touch the buttons. I swipe my card again, and he reaches for the buttons...I hiss "DON'T TOUCH THE STUPID BUTTONS OR YOU WON'T GET TO TAKE THE FRUIT SNACKS HOME!"

I take out $380 (the total of my purchase was $619) and it says I have reached my limit for the day. SAY WHAAAAT?! I feel the lump rising in my throat. I start saying to myself "stay calm dammit. You're not going to cry!"

So I go over to the customer service. They, so helpfully, tell me that I should just buy my own membership! That way I can write a check. Instead I decide to call my bank. Apparently, my card has a $605/day limit. Who knew?! I went to two other stores before Costco. She said she wouldn't take the limit off for me, so I had to take the GPS and iPod out of my purchase and buy the groceries. Of course, Lillie was REALLY mad by now. Inconsolable. I was just glad to be out of there with my groceries, and without shedding a tear.

Then I went to my friend's wedding on Saturday, and teared up when she walked in! You can't hold them in all the time!