Saturday, April 11, 2009

Being a SAHM isn't enough?

Here I am! I'm 27 years old and married with two kids. I stay at home and like to refer to myself as a "domestic engineer." My life is very different than I pictured it would be. You know those surveys your friends forward you that ask you want your life will be like in 10 years. I laugh when I think about what I put on those puppies even 5 years ago.
I thought I wanted to wear power suits, and carry a leather briefcase. My college years were spent aspiring to a glamorous job in Public Relations. My professors said I had talent for it, so I ventured out in the world ready to take it by the tail. HA! Then reality set in, and I had rent to pay. I ended up working for a logistics company. Of course, that job wasn't what I really wanted to do. So I got a new one as a technical recruiter AKA a telemarketer who tries to find computer nerds a job. FAILED! Luckily, by that time I had already met Ryan (my husband) and he moved in with me while I tried to find a job. Long story made short...I never did and we got married and here I am.
So the funny part about all this is I ended up being at home which most people of my generation know isn't ever enough. You see people from the past and they say "what are you doing these days?"
"Oh, I'm JUST staying at home," we reply.
It's never enough. You should be doing more. You should be working and taking care of your kids! There is a stigma against those of us that JUST stay at home.
Well, I spend my days feeding, changing, cleaning, entertaining, educating, and being generally at the beck and call of a 2 year old and a 2 month old. It's enough! I'm freakin' exhausted at the end of the day! How do those working moms do it?
Some moms feel like they need to get out and away from their children or they will go crazy. (Believe me there are times when I understand that need!) In general though I find myself anxious and unfocused when I'm away from my children for too long. I just don't think I would be cut out for the working mom thing. I also feel like what I'm doing is a very important thing by staying home.

So maybe I don't have a job as a PR Executive and a power suit that fits anymore, but I am the boss around here.


Cari said...

Hey Lady, I'm excited you started this blog, I have one too, I'm sure you'll be better at writing than me though, but I try. Speaking as a mom (single mom) no less who works, I know that what you do is just as hard, just with no pay and no health insurance. I wish I could stay home, I'm jealous, can't wait to read all about it